telltaleS eXamPles: sTranGe smells & rinGin’ Bells “If someone like me is caught inside,” he said, “My only escape would be right through whoever opens the front door. I’d kill you if I had to.” I’ve been using telltales ever since. WAIT, LOOK, SNIFF ANd SENSE People are finally getting smart about responding to a knock on the and having home invaders come lsewhere in this issue you’ll find my scribbles on door crashing in. So, crooks are reviving the personal protection and self-defense products. While old “bump-and-tumble.” The phrase writing that, it got me to thinkin’ and remembering… originally meant a maneuver used by Yeah, that actually happens sometimes. And bad luck for two cops when taking down a possibly armed and dangerous suspect. After you, here are some of those thoughts: hearing arresting officers call it that, Back when I was a cop I busted put some change, several rumpled crooks began using it to describe when a graduate of the Folsom Prison dollar bills with a $10 or $20 on top. they would approach a victim from the charm school. Released on parole Or, you can place one where it’s visi- rear as they were opening their front doors. During that vulnerable few on a technicality, he briefly dabbled ble as soon as you open the door. in his old pastime of armed robbery, It was an “entry check”; in some seconds when the door is open and the and then went into large-scale high- ways more reliable than checking victim’s entering, they slam you from end fencing of stolen goods. He for forced entry. As he explained, the back, knockin’ you inside and then rented a half-dozen homes in nice whether the intruder is a garden-vari- closing the door behind them. Bingo, middle-class neighborhoods, made ety opportunist, a hard-core crook, easy victim. The defense isn’t tough, but beyond them look occupied, and filled them or a “business competitor” waitwith stolen property. After I wrapped ing to kill you, none can resist grab- most people. As you approach your door, you just have to look him up on his “3rd strike,” around and see if you have he voluntarily took me on company within strika tour of those homes. He ing distance—and have a wasn’t getting a plea deal real appreciation for how or brownie points out of it. fast thugs can move. EspeHe said some of his stored cially if you have loved items were obviously cherones inside, you don’t open ished family heirlooms, and that door while the danger if he couldn’t profit from exists. Better to deal with it them ’cause he was goin’ outside. Hopefully you’re back inside, he’d rather equipped to shoot, scream they were returned to their or scram, depending. owners than profit other Now for the other side crooks. Go figure, huh? of the coin: Once you have At each residence I noted the door open, unless you’re he would go to a window being greeted by friendly and glance inside before Here’s one of my telltales: Lothar, a 19th-century British inkwell. Fido and happy family, don’t unlocking the door. At one Eat yer hearts out—he’s mine! step right in. Take a sharp place he eyeballed the front, look inside for anything out then went through a breezeway to the side, where he peeped into bing obvious cash—and if someone of place. Sniff the air. A faint tobacco the kitchen, tried the doorknob, entered, they may still be inside. If scent, but you don’t smoke? Body odor then satisfied, came around to peep he saw his telltale disturbed he would that’s not yours? Crank up your senses. through a front window, then unlock step back to his truck, retrieve a gun, You know how sometimes you can sense the front door. and if anything smelled particularly that someone—usually repair people, He was checking his “telltales” wrong he’d call for a backup, just as landlord, whatever—have been in your place, and you can’t articulate how you before entering. Here’s how that a cop might. works: Select a point inside which At the place where he checked the knew that? Senses and instincts ain’t the is not easily visible from outside, side door, that was because first, he exclusive purview of animals. A single lady who had just taken but visible from at least one small had a secondary telltale inside there, space or angle through one window; and second, it was the only other way one of my Uncle John’s “Living Safe” like, when peering through a slightly out, and that door had a double- seminars arrived home, opened her bent venetian blind at the lower left cylinder deadbolt lock because there door, and did that “pause and sense” corner of a window. There you place was a glass pane in the door. If number. She could sense something a Mason jar, a sterling dish, a decora- someone were inside, they couldn’t wasn’t right. She stood there for several seconds—and a guy’s head tive Chinese bowl, something—and flee through that door. E John Connor 78 W W W . G U N S M A G A Z I N E . C O M • J U LY 2 0 1 3
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