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American Handgunner March/April 2010 - Page 26

Mike “Duke” Venturino SHOOTINGIRON TM Photos: Yvonne Venturino THUMB BUSTIN’ MUSINGS FROM THE DUKE any times I’ve been asked by other “gun guys” if I thought they might be “gun’riter material.” Mostly they mistakenly believe writing a few articles insures them free hunts to the “Three big As.” That is Africa, Australia or Alaska. Not to mention all the free guns and accessories that go with the big bucks gun’riters make. Sure! Right! Dream on! Being a fan of Jeff’s Foxworthy’s “You might be a redneck if …” comedy routines, I’ve decided to paraphrase him so you can judge yourself as to whether you are gun’riter material. If your folks bribed you into going to the senior prom with the loan of their car and some cash but then you took your date home immediately after the dance and then drove to the nearest city with a gun store so you could spend the money on bullet moulds, powder and primers — you may be gun’riter material. If during college you didn’t buy the prescribed school books and instead spent the money on gun magazines, and You Know You’re A Gun’Riter If . M If you would rather be casting bullets while everyone else is watching the Super Bowl then you are probably good gun’riter material. more bullet moulds, powder, and primers, then you may be gun’riter material. If in college you majored in journalism although you seldom read a newspaper, then you’re shaping up to be good gun’riter material. If the college you attended mandated a student have a minimum 2.00 grade point average to graduate and you had a 2.10 average, and your friends still chide you for being an overachiever, then you were probably heading down the gun’riter career road from the very beginning. If you met the perfect girl and decided to get married but had to sell some guns to afford traveling to your own wedding, then you are getting close to becoming a gun’riter. That’s especially true if over the next 30 or so years you never let her forget the sacrifice you made for her. Ball Games? f you have never had any trouble remembering your wife’s birthday or your wedding anniversary because your mind is practiced at remembering numbers because since your early teens you have memorized calibers, powder charges, bullet mould numbers and so forth, gun’riting is probably in your blood. If you have absolutely no interest in any games that involve balls — football, basketball, baseball, tennis, golf, soccer, ping pong or whatever — you have the gun’riter spirit. Likewise, if your TV has never played any game involving any of the above mentioned balls and you only have a fuzzy idea as to what a Super Bowl is but your DVD Library contains movies like Quigley Down Under and Band of Brothers then you are looking like good gun’riter material. If a dinner conversation with a table full of friends centers around the number of grease grooves on your favorite cast bullets, along with their shape, alloy temper and sizing diameters, you may be a boring individual, but likely good gun’riter material. If you are at a gun show, gun store, or shooting match and loudly pronounce to your companions you have all the guns you have ever wanted and then a few minutes later they catch you shelling out money for a new gun, then you are most cerShelling out money tainly gun’riter material. after all. I hought having 200 pounds of pig lead ingots on the dining room floor is a good idea … If you’ve ever been excited buying a gun at a gun show and when you get home you see you already have one in your safe … You find yourself digging deep into your gun safe (safes?) and regularly saying, “Hey, I forgot I had this!” … If you find yourself saying, “But honey, 5,000 rounds of .308 isn’t enough!” … When you honestly think reading 35 year old GUNS Magazines — you bought on the newsstand 35 years before — is a really fun way to spend an evening … When you move you need to hire a 28 foot Penske truck just to haul your ammo … If your desk is cluttered with hundreds of bullets and cartridges that you “need for photo props,” then it’s likely you are a gun’riter and a pretty good one. And lastly, if your last thoughts at night before you fall asleep are about the shape of the next cast bullet you want to design and not about your wife’s shape, then it is likely you have been a gun’riter for If your desk is cluttered a long, long time. with hundreds of bullets and cartridges that are used Maybe too as photo props, then you long? may already be a gun’riter! T If You’ve Ever … * 26 WWW.AMERICANHANDGUNNER.COM • MARCH/APRIL2010

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